the Wild Hamster

They say that life is unpredictable. But what's the reason for that? I think we'll never know. But what I do feel is that the person responsible for this is the big man above. I feel he's been pretty random when it comes to sowing my life with unexpected events and outcomes. Most of the time, it's all been positive however.

Just last week, I had made a decision to stay in my warm and fuzzy corner at my current workplace, a decision spurred by the fact that it was a comfortable place to be and the pay was decent. Also, I was happy.

Of course, in the back of my mind, I still yearned for deliverance - something which I've prayed for ever since I knew how to pray. Indeed, the past couple of years I have been incessantly praying for some divine help to show me where I must go in life.

But then, I also realised that maybe if he showed me the path I also wouldn't know what it would look like.

It's not like he's going to send an angel down to me and the angel will take a classified ad, shove it in my face and say, 'NAH, THIS ONE LAH, WHAT YOU WAITING FOR? THIS HUAN WILL MAKE CHIU HEYPI!'

You get the picture. Still, I did not give up hope.

Then last week, just when I had made a decision to stay, a call came from someone I know about a potential opportunity.

Call it fate, or providence, but it really did come at the exact moment when I was about to relay my decision to commit to my current management. A few days later, I decided to take it up.

In all honesty, I have no idea what I'm doing. It's very much a leap of faith. As Donald Trump says, sometimes, you've just got to trust your instincts. And making this move feels quite right, even though I've been literally ripped out of my comfort zone and thrust into action.

As a consequence, I've had to partake in a flurry of activities over the past few days.

It's pretty exhausting, especially since I have to juggle my new duties with the demands of my current job, which I have to stay in until the date when I officially step out of the door.

But at the same time, it's a happy kind of tired. So far, I'm quite thrilled with what I'm doing.

As I've said before, I don't know where this will lead. But as my new superior says, as long as you have passion, luck will come. So I'm just going to plunge headlong into this and pray once again that I will end up somewhere much better than where I am now in a few years time.

And I must never forget those who made it happen. Especially the big man above, for I am eternally grateful to for having provided for me and my family over these years.

Today, I made the decision.. to shelf my earlier decision. Temporarily. I think.

In all honesty, it was made on a whim. Without any clear motivation. I am as undecided about it as I was earlier in the day, or yesterday or the week before. But I had to make a decision, and so I made it.

Going forward, it seems to be a right move to make, though I admit that the lure of a free life was very seductive, and that the path I have taken seems a bit selfish, and its probably going to cost someone (hopefully, not me) dearly (or not dearly, maybe undearly, or deerly, or venison. maybe beefly? or chickenly? wallaby!)

I've not lost my desire to strike it out on my own. After evaluating my position, I feel that I still need some more time to re-evaluate that direction.

It will also give me a chance to further strengthen my available capital, and allow me time to do the things that I want to do, which I feel I may not do even when I am not employed. Self-motivation has always been a problem.

In any case, I have made my choice. At the very least, my situation is slightly different than last year because I have a 'get out' clause, which I can exercise at any time after giving one month's notice. Which means that I always have the option to walk away should I so feel like it.

Maybe a few months is all I need to think about what I really want to do.

But one thing I do know is that I also have another job opportunity which seems very interesting (and in my league) from Stream's friend. If I get the chance to do that job I will probably jump at it.

For now though, I am staying put. For how long more, I do not yet know. Yet I am very much aware that I am not become any younger. And people 10 years younger than me are sailing off into the distance while Im stuck on a sinking sampan.

I am also very much aware that I have to get off at some point lest I drown.

Better collect as much lifesavers before I jump though. Or maybe a life raft. And some clean underwear as well.

Ive just finished watching the top 11 performance of American Idol and I have to say this: I believe that there's no one on AI so far that compares to Adam Lambert.

Before the top 13 was determined I was an ardent Danny Gokey fan, but I have now officially switched allegiances to Adam. It started last week after his mindblowing Black and White performance.

But this week. Holy smokes. I'm speechless. His performance of 'Ring of Fire' from Johnny Cash just completely floored me. Although Simon says it blows I find it shockingly addictive. In fact, I just downloaded the MP3 rip of Adam's portion of the show and Im playing it now.

Omg man. Talk about uniqueness. That's an understatement for Adam Lambert. He's bizarre, he's weird, and at the same time he's one of the best singers in the World.

To sum up, here's a perfect comment from one AI viewer:

Ok, so I hate Adam Lambert and his assault on my eardrums screech.

But I have to say that as much as I was determined to hate him, I loved it! It was so weird and bizarre and awful, but in all the right ways. All I know is I can’t stop listening to it. What the hell? I’m so confused right now.

Adam Lambert is like meth. Makes you feel like shit but you just can’t stop.

Its time to make a change.

I think I have stayed in my comfort zone for too long. I need to venture out, make new discoveries, discover new challenges, challenge new horizons.

What am I going to do next? I have totally no idea. I envy those who know what they want in life. You know, those who already map out their entire future.. their hopes and dreams.. their short, mid and long term goals.

For some reason, I just can't do the same thing. Maybe its because I don't know what I want, though on the flip side I believe that its because I want too many things.

It isn't all murky up ahead though. I've got some ideas on what I think I might do. And most of them don't involve being under someone else's employ. Which is what I really want .. I think. Working independently will mean I have the space to exercise my creative thoughts and ideas, even if they are doomed from the start. Well, that's the way to learn ainit?

I've always felt restricted while working for others. Felt something missing, as if it was wrong, even though it looks right as rain. So maybe working for myself is the best option. Some may call it the arrogance of youth. I prefer to call it entrepreneurship.

Granted, I will no longer have the security that employment brings. Then again, maybe that's what I need for some major motivation. Besides, if I don't do it now, I may never have the chance to do it when again when I'm older.

Another obstacle is the steep learning curve. I'll pretty much be starting from scratch, and there's LOTS to learn. I like learning new things though, so that's fine.

Finally, there's a good chance that I may fail. But as they say, Fortes fortuna adiuvat. In any case, I will be giving much thought to this decision before I make it. As life changing endeavours go, there is none that will be as big as this.

Ad victoriam!

Well, as much as I like the old design, I thought it was pretty glaring as well. Mean on the eyes and all..

Besides.. i think a more wild environment would be suitable..

Its so hard to find a good netbook. And by good I mean one that comes with a SSD. SSD means Solid State Drive. or Solid State Device. or Smooth and Silky Design. Or Safe and Secure Drive.

Many people are jumping for netbooks nowadays coz well, they're cheaper and smaller.

To cut cost and make them seem more attractive, manufacturers are releasing netbooks with normal hard drives in them, and people are snapping these up.

Its a great idea of course. Normal HDs are cheaper and have bigger storage. But what many people fail to realise is that they also have MOVING PARTS.

It doesn't take a lot for a hard disk to fail. In fact, if its processing something all you need is a tap on the laptop to damage it. Yes, its that easy.

For normal desktops, hard disk failure arising from such actions are uncommon(since its probably stuck in an immobile casing.

In a laptop, the risk is higher as you're moving it around all the time. In a NETBOOK, the risk is extreme.

Why? Because netbooks they are small and light, people tend to move them around more often. They often think that netbooks are mobile phones and fling them around like they're indestructible. In fact, I recently saw a guy trying to look cool by walking around with a netbook and watching a video on it.

To be sure, laptop and netbook hard disks are more durable than normal desktop drives. Its a technology thing. However, no matter what technology you put into a normal hard disk, you still can't change its principle of operation.

If your netbook contains an SSD (new type of disk with no movable parts), then good for you. You can play table tennis with your netbook and itll be fine. However, if it contains a normal hard disk, I suggest you NOT MOVE IT WHEN ITS TURNED ON.

All storage disks are equal. But some disks are more equal than others.

I'm going ....




downstairs to buy a bottle of starfruit juice.